Forshizelmynizel » hillbilly humor

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Idahoan

fctoma — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 03:26:00 +0000

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You’re walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a weapon, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What the fuck do you do?

Democrat’s Answer

Well, that’s not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
What does the law say about this situation?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway,
and what kind of message does
this send to society and to my children?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

Republican’s Answer

BANG!

Idahoan’s Answer

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click….. (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
Click

Daughter: “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?
Son: Can I shoot the next one!
Wife: And you Ain’t Taking That To the taxidermist.

Idaho really is a good place…

Take a look at the Best of the Best

fctoma — Wed, 16 May 2007 02:31:00 +0000

Here’s a few Tshirts and other “Best of the Best” photos I’ve received over the past few days in emails. Some of them are pretty damn funny. I’m thinking that my favorite is the Levi’s Jeans… can you blame me? What guy (and some women) wouldn’t want that hanging in their closet!

The Best Blond award… whattttttt a dumbass!

Best underwear of the year…. hmmmmmm

Best Hand bag for a male… if you’re asking for trouble

Best use of Jeans in 2006, or well, 2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004 and 2005

Can’t think of a better place for a drunk driver to park!

Best titty snapshot and sneak a peak!

Ah yes… my favorite. Look at the stiching on these jeans!

Tell me, who wouldn’t want to?

The best hair product, man or animal…

Best improvement on a classic

Survivor Show – Idaho Style

fctoma — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 03:04:00 +0000

Due to the popularity of the Survivor’s shows, Idaho is planning to do its own, title “Survivor Idaho Style

The contestants will start in Pocatello, travel over to Blackfoot. Then they will head up to Idaho Falls and Rexburg. From there they will proceed on to St. Anthony, and Salmon. Then they will go west to Challis, Stanley and over to Riggins through McCall. From Riggins they will go back down to Cambridge, Weiser, over to Payette and Fruitland.

They would travel through Caldwell, Nampa and Boise, taking I-84 to Mountain Home, Jerome and Twin Falls. The final leg will be through Burley, Rupert, American Falls, ending back in Pocatello.

Each contestant will be driving a pink Volvo with California license plates and a LARGE bumper sticker that reads:

“I’m gay. I’m a Vegetarian. Beer is harmful to your health. Republicans Suck. Hillary in 2008. Deer hunting is murder, and I’m here to confiscate your guns

The first one that makes it back to Pocatello alive, wins. Good luck to all contestants.